I have. I will. I am.

First of all...

Are the St. Louis Rams really in first place in the NFC West?

Or I as I say...

"NFC Worst? Hahahahaha."

No. I'm kidding.

But seriously? C'mon Seattle! You've got TWO highly touted Notre Dame players on your team! Step. It. Up. I hear that Curt Warner was willing to sign on. He's like fifty years old though, so don't push the man.

I bet everyone is really confused right now.

Curt>
I dunno. I'll talk to Wesley about that.

"Dude, KURT Warner. Hands. Down."

Why the fuck is it "hands down"?

I guess phrases like that never usually make sense.

OKAY CALEB FOCUS

So I'm really loving this Christmas spirit going around Indiana right now. More notably, down town Indianapolis, since I spend so much more time there.

And by "there," I mean like ten minutes away from my house.

I set my alarm for six o'clock this morning.

I decided that I should start taking a nap between 2 and 5:59 in the morning. That way, I don't feel weird when I've been up for four days.

I woke up and made some coffee. Fucking...coffee. It's becoming that line for me. I can't cross that line. I'm one cream and sugar away from, "Yea! I'll have a double shot espresso latte frapacaparapatapamochachinoooohhhhWHATTHEFUCKAMIDOINGHEREDEARGODSAVEMEFROMTHISBEANHELLFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!"

Anyways.

I wanted to be up this morning. Because lately, I've been staying up and writing down all of my thoughts in my note books. And I usually find myself doing most of my writing in the hours when the sun is coming up.

I like it.

It's making me mold myself into a person I want to be for the rest of my life. It's making me comfortable in my own skin. It's making me wish I would have done this during high school. Things would have been so much better.

I'm starting to appreciate myself more and more. Before this, I would have found some way to burn myself.

But now I like myself. I like what I'm doing. I'm liking what I'm going to BE doing. I'm liking the fact that I've surrounded myself with wonderful people.

Sorry...love.

Eventually, I'm going to dig so far into my brain, that I'll be able to make everything better. So much better. The best that it can be. And you guys will be a part of it. Because I love you.

I'll just keep on writing in my note books.

I'll just keep on pushing. (Ahh. Running with the devil.)

I'll just keep on making things better for myself.

I'll just keep on making things better for you, darling.

For you, Wes.