For you, Miss.Wicker

So today was pretty successful.

I got my college schedule made out today. And that process wasn't stressful at all. Nope. No way. Completely, 100% stress free!

So this is what it made it so stressful...
First of all, the lady guiding us through the process was possibly mayyyyybeeeee...80...billion. Years. Old. And random body parts kept falling off of her. Eventually she withered away, and we had three more, inexperienced young(er) ladies come in and help us. And since I'm getting in my classes so late in the summer, I only scored one morning class. Danish. Danish all to hell.

But lemme back track a bit...

Before this had all taken place, I had a dentist appointment scheduled about four hours before my class selection had taken place.
And just so we're all on the same page, my appointment was at 10 a.m. and my class selection was at 2 p.m.
Anywhoozle...
I get to the office right at ten, and they lady at the front desk, Christina is her name I think, was all bubbly and happy. She tells me to have a seat and they'll get me to the back rooms asap.
Forty-five minutes later, I am finally in that bendy, uncomfortable dentists chair. With that huge fucking light shining directly into the center of my eyes. And my dentist, God save me, is this black guy named Sean. Now...Sean is not just ANY ol' black guy. He's Tiger. Which means he almost as white as I am, and I'm transparent. And the goal was to get my porcelain tooth in where my plastic one sits. Yes. I have false teeth. Good thing I'm not trying to get any lady friends of mine to notice me.............(the dots mean I'm being facetious)
So he cut off the plastic one, and try's unsuccessfully to shove the newer, shinier one, into this metal rod that was drilled into my skull about two months ago.
But of course, THAT didn't work out. Like at all. Nigger.
So he's cutting the rod shorter so this new tooth will fit, but he was gonna have to cut on the sides of my gums. Awesome. But I hadn't the time. So I was like fuck it, don't give me any Novocain. It won't hurt THAT bad, and if you do indeed give me Novocain, I'll be as high as a kite all day.

I have never hurt so much...ever. Well actually...yes I have. Not the fucking point.
So I get the tooth on. Only it's neon white. Again, I'm glad I'm not trying to impress any ladies...................(you know the situation)

Sean likes to sing while operating. So while I was wringing in pain from a saw to the gums, he was preoccupied in singing "Paparazzi" by Lady Gaga. Fuck you Tiger Woods wanna be. I hope your wife beats you senseless tonight.

I've been dieting. Just so you all know. And all this week started off my "I won't consume like a monster ever again" campaign. And it's been pretty successful so far. I drink sixty-four ounces of water a day. And I eat...good food. And by "good," I mean fucking terrible. But whatever.

I'm gonna be all lean and stuff. Hell. Yus. You know you wanna piece. Maybe not now. But when I've slimmed!

Fuck you, Conservatives!!!